Fellow Americans, prepare to be roasted.
"I call ranch dressing 'American sauce.' One time, when eating with a group of friends, I said, 'Pass me the American sauce,' and they all knew what I was talking about
It's dumb, but I get a kick out of it because ranch feels so American
Even the name: ranch
"I rode in an ambulance once when I was 17; it cost me 960 USD
"'Ah, a fellow American.'"