Alex Smith on His Comeback: “I Never Thought it Would Happen” - GQ

Neither option was good, and neither left Smith, a former number one overall pick, much chance of playing football again.

(Duh.) He spoke with GQ to talk about the decision to keep his leg, the reasons he decided to play football again, and the chances we’ll see him on the field again in 2021?

Why play football again this year.

And they were the first ones in a rehab session, really early on, to put a football in my hands.

I hadn't touched a football and I had kind of been bitter towards football because I'm like, I was playing this stupid game and [the injury] happened.

I remember how good it felt to play catch, how good it felt to have a football in my hand.

I'd been playing catch my whole life, and how natural it felt.

I just enjoyed doing rehab with a football in my hand: Give me the football to see if I can do this.

I was going to take my rehab further than I would if I had just settled on being able to stand or golf.

I know I'm ancient and old in football terms, being 36, but I was like, "Man, I got the rest of my life.

Really, a big part of me was skeptical, like, that's not going to happen anyway, I'm going to hit the wall before I get there.

They were like, "If you want to play football again, you can do it."?

"Yeah, that's really nice that you're trying." When I decided to come back, I definitely threw a wrench in the team's plan.

I felt like I still hadn't had my fair shake at that point.

I wanted to see if I could play quarterback and play football, and I feel like I hadn't been given that opportunity yet to find that out.

At least I'm going to see if I can.

So when you go into your first game against the Rams this year, is there any part of you that's like, "What the...

I’d just gotten bumped up from third string to backup, and boom, sure enough, I'm playing.

A ton of dread and terror, and really wondering what was going to happen when I go out there and get tackled.

Also just the crazy excitement and rush and exhilaration of being able to play football again.

I don't think I've ever been tackled like that in my entire career, ever playing football.

I was able to put all the contact stuff behind me and I could really just move on to playing football again.

I'm like, "I have a D-lineman on my back right now." And I took a couple of small steps before I went down?

I know in the 60 Minutes piece, you said a lot of people are like, “I feel like your mom watching you play.” And I will say, it's scary watching you.

All my buddies, especially guys that I played with earlier in my career, all had told me that, like, "Dude, I just can't watch.

I'm on pins and needles every time you're out there." I got to play one more time as a backup, and I felt really good playing, really natural, I didn't feel like I hesitated at all out there.

And then [it was] really, really eerie, for my first start, how good I felt, how comfortable I was out there.

I kept thinking I would have more apprehension after everything that I'd been through and I felt like that would linger longer, but it really didn't.

I really felt like it was like ripping a Band-Aid off.

I feel really good out there.

I feel like I'm just playing football.".

I felt like I had to justify my draft status.

They would always talk about, "Man, I'm going to live today." And they'd walk around and challenge you, like, "Are you going to live today?" And I'm this young quarterback and I'm like, "What the hell are you talking about?" [laughs].

And certainly what an opportunity it is to go out there on Sundays and play, to be like kids.

I can imagine in those situations, there could be a little bit of, "Why me?" And then the injury happens, and I imagine that has to also be like, "Why me?" Do you feel unlucky.

I got drafted as the number one pick—we were the worst team in football the year before.

I was playing decent football.

But also I felt like when I got traded, it was also this brand new opportunity.

I still feel like I have a lot of football ahead of me, and I'm going to go and run with this thing and go.

At that point, I didn't have much, "Why me?" I was like, "I got another year.

I feel like I'm still reaching my potential, I just came off the best year in my career in year 13.".

Faced with that, when I kind of came to, that's when I really got dark.

How did this happen?" I was playing football.

Just like, my life's never going to be the same.

Going back to: It was just football?

I was just playing football?

Do you have any more answers or thoughts on whether or not you're going to retire, or keep playing.

I felt like last year, just based on where my rehab was and then COVID, I didn't get to answer a lot of those.

I made a ton of gains through the year, and I still feel like I have more left to go gain.

I still feel like there's stuff for me to go get out there, and get better.